Let's Be Real

Y'all, I have been struggling lately. I have been struggling with fear. Fear is something that seems to sneak up on me and make me question  e v e r y  s i n g l e  t h i n g  I do or want to do. I wish I could say that isn't true but I know fear is a part of most of our lives. It is an irrational emotion because we are SO LOVED by a God who is SO MUCH bigger than fear. But, I'm human and I still feel it. I still question decisions I make and I still want to know what I am supposed to do with my life!

Time to be real... The other night after getting my seventh "Sorry we did not pick you for this position," I just lost it. I lost it and was crying out to Him to give me peace that it's all going to be OK. I want to "laugh without fear of the future." I want to spend my last (36!) days of college enjoying my friends, my community and my university. But it's so easy for me to feel lost and confused about what I'm supposed to be our do when I grow up (in 36 days).  I have been questioning myself so much lately between finding a job, making products for my shop and starting a business. When I do this, I doubt my education and my creative instincts continually wondering if they are enough. But you know what friends? God is good and He knows the plans He has for me and it sometimes takes a good hard (ugly) cry to realize that I do not want talents like anyone else has... I want to use the ones I have to the best of my abilities to bring glory to Him! But with all that said, I am so thankful for the journey of life that has brought me here and I am excited for the next chapter whatever it may be!

3-21 | Trisomy 21 | World Down Syndrome Awareness Day

Today is a very special day, it's a day that is near and dear to my heart... World Down Syndrome Awareness Day. I'll be the first to admit that growing up I was uncomfortable with special needs. I never knew exactly what to say or do, or how to act. I did not understand.

I began reading blogs when I started college in 2010. The first blog I read daily was Enjoying the Small Things by Kelle Hampton. I read this post and my heart was forever changed. Each and every time I read that post the tears just keep flowin'. Kelle writes about the birth of her daughter Nella, who she didn't know had Down syndrome until the moment she saw her. It's her story of coming to terms with what that means and learning how to love fully through watching her older daughter love her baby sister without judgement... You should read it.

And God knew... God knew my heart for Down syndrome had changed and He placed a little girl into my life, Mia.

For countless summers I was a swim coach. In summer of 2011, I was given the privilege of coaching a little 5-year-old with Down syndrome. Mia was my biggest challenge and greatest joy. She changed my heart with her determination, frustration and radiant smiles. I'll never forget her blatant NOs and she ecstatic joy when she accomplished a goal. I have been able to coach Mia for three summers but last summer definitely stands out.

The day she swam a whole lap in a swim meet in front of over a hundred people... I sobbed. I was standing there at the end of the lane with her parents cheering her on, keeping her looking and swimming forward and sobbing. When she climbed out at the end, I will never forget this moment, Mia looked up at me and asked, "Did I do good?" I just smiled and laughed through my tears and said, "You did amazing sweet girl and I am SO proud of you."

My sister works at a special needs preschool here in Raleigh and I love being able to go and volunteer in her class one day a week. The little girl above is Ella and she also has three copies of the 21st chromosome. I must say, she has captured my heart (and Taylor's) as well!

Working with children with special needs is truly a gift. I am so thankful that by finding a blog God changed my heart and taught me how to love regardless of differences.

A New Lane

I have been a summer swim league coach for seven years. Yes, you read that right. For seven years, I have taught two-year-olds to 18-year-olds how to swim and how to swim correctly. I have been around water my entire life so it only seemed natural to have a job in the summer involving a pool, the sun and getting tan.

But coaching has always been so much more than a job to me. Coaching swimming is teaching a life saving skill that often falls to the wayside. Teaching kids how to swim or how to safely get out of the water is something I have always taken very seriously and am honored to have taught so many kids this life lesson. I love to see the pride in kids faces when they learn something new or when they make a best time in an event. 

My entire family has been involved in the swimming world for at least a decade, probably longer. The Lake Norman Swim League has had a Jones coach on every team except one! My brother, sister and I were all breaststroke swimmers. This is funny because my parents never wanted us to compete against each other in the same sport... andddd then we all chose the same event. Every summer at the league championship meet there is a coaches relay. Since Taylor, Casey and I coached on different teams and all swam breaststroke, we naturally always got to race each other! :)

With coaching and teaching swim lessons all throughout the summer, I practically lived in a one piece. But  I can't imagine having spent my summers any other way. Memories like seeing one of my sweet little girls who has Downs Syndrome swim her first lap or seeing another conquer fear of letting go, are memories I will cherish forever.

The older girls on the team also have a special place in my heart. I have loved seeing them grow in their confidence and step up into the role of leaders for the younger kids. 

This summer will be the first summer in seven years that I will not be a summer swim league coach. Goodness, that was harder to say than I thought. Coaching has been such an amazing opportunity for me to learn so many life skills that I will now put towards a career. It is scary not having the "safety net" of coaching but I am trusting in the Lord because I know that His plans are better than any I could make up on my own. 

I am thankful to all the families I have met through coaching and will forever cherish the memories. And I love that many of the kids I have taught still call me Coach Morgan.

Journey of Young Life

I know I have been a stranger more than I would like on this little blog. I have been so incredibly busy this semester with school, job applications and designing morganalexandra.com. I would definitely appreciate y'alls prayers for peace about the future and knowing that He has it all under control!

I wanted to share a little more about myself today. We're going to take it back eight years ago. My freshman year of high school I was invited to a thing called Young Life by one of my friends, Laura, who was a senior. So needless to say, I felt super cool. I did not know this at the time but Young Life is a non-denominational Christian ministry that reaches out to high school students by being present in their lives in a positive and encouraging way.
Young Life was held at another seniors house in the notoriously wealthy neighborhood and seemed to be a great place to have fun and hang out with friends. Even though I had no idea what Young Life was really about, I continued to go and I continued to have a girl from Davidson College asking me to hang out, which at the time I thought was super odd (and now having been that college student asking high schoolers to hang out... it's hilarious!).

After the seniors graduated, we combined with our rival high school in a mutual territory. I started to invite one of my best friends at that rival high school who I have known my entire life, Matt Powell. Eventually, the Lake Norman/Mooresville Young Life ended but that would not be the end of Young Life for Matt!

Matt and I both ended up at North Carolina State University for college. I was immediately brought back to Young Life and it would end up being the reason why I did not transfer away from NCSU. I always invited Matt but he would find his own way to Young Life a little bit later on in our college career. 
Friends, last night Matt gave his first Young Life talk!! I was only able to get five minutes of the talk because of a low battery but five minutes is long enough to see his HEART for the Lord and for sharing that love with others. This ministry has incredible power to meet people wherever they are in life and love them through the ups and downs. I am so thankful to all the friends I have made through Young Life and how they are changing others lives!