Y'all, I have been struggling lately. I have been struggling with fear. Fear is something that seems to sneak up on me and make me question e v e r y s i n g l e t h i n g I do or want to do. I wish I could say that isn't true but I know fear is a part of most of our lives. It is an irrational emotion because we are SO LOVED by a God who is SO MUCH bigger than fear. But, I'm human and I still feel it. I still question decisions I make and I still want to know what I am supposed to do with my life!
Time to be real... The other night after getting my seventh "Sorry we did not pick you for this position," I just lost it. I lost it and was crying out to Him to give me peace that it's all going to be OK. I want to "laugh without fear of the future." I want to spend my last (36!) days of college enjoying my friends, my community and my university. But it's so easy for me to feel lost and confused about what I'm supposed to be our do when I grow up (in 36 days).
I have been questioning myself so much lately between finding a job, making products for my shop and starting a business. When I do this, I doubt my education and my creative instincts continually wondering if they are enough. But you know what friends? God is good and He knows the plans He has for me and it sometimes takes a good hard (ugly) cry to realize that I do not want talents like anyone else has... I want to use the ones I have to the best of my abilities to bring glory to Him! But with all that said, I am so thankful for the journey of life that has brought me here and I am excited for the next chapter whatever it may be!
Love your heart Morgan! I know exactly what you're feeling. Being a college senior is fun, but I think the fear of the unknown kind of takes over. Hang in there, girl! Praying for you!
ReplyDeleteI remember that feeling like it was yesterday. 2 years later and I still feel that way once and a while! Hang in there, you'll figure it out!
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